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As my friend Lindsey, married and in her thirties, recently remarked, “I’m sure glad I wasn’t much of a Christian when I started dating my husband!” Whether over coffee in my kitchen or on the hallowed ground of women’s small groups, I hear these murmurs constantly.

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Dating does not carry special divine sanction like marriage.

A wise man once told me that there were only two outcomes for dating relationships: getting married or breaking up.

“The secret,” he said, “is knowing how to handle a dating relationship so you know if the other person is worth marrying or he or she is honored in the breakup.” Unfortunately, it seems like many young singles struggle to figure out just how to handle dating–and I’m not the only one who’s noticed how weird the Christian dating scene can be.

He has not left you to crude speculation (libertarian) or crass rigidity (purist). God is not sitting on the sidelines of your romantic life waiting for you to become winsome (Prov. He anticipates, delights in, and works through awkward faithfulness (1 Cor. (4) Pre-marital romantic feelings are part of the inherent goodness of creation (Gen. Fall: (5) You are a sinner, and will desire to use, lie, manipulate, and push emotional, physical, and relational boundaries for unholy reasons (Jer. Don't structure your relationship as if you will always be at the top of your game (Matt.

Here are some starting places for living in an other-worldly (Eph.




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No wonder coming up with the perfect dating nickname can be harder than writing an entire profile! Step 2 – Get scribbling A good dating profile name should sum you up in a few letters, or at least give some interesting clues about what type of person you are. Leave your notepad on the kitchen counter, your desk or in the car – somewhere you can find it easily whenever a new word comes into your head.


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My first night in a club, I was promised by my older cousin, would be a night I would never forget.